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| "How much flesh would a Woodchipper chip, if a Woodchipper could chip flesh? " |
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Woodchipper Massacre
DVD/APPROX. 90 MINS/1988/USA UNRATED
DVD/APPROX. 90 MINS/1988/USA UNRATED
Back in the dark days of VHS, I had a friend who was looking to trade his copy of Woodchipper Massacre. The movie had such a great title that I
decided I needed to own it. He lent it to me first, and after watching it, I decided maybe I didn’t need it after all…
In Woodchipper Massacre a loving, happy family has rented a woodchipper for doing some yard work. The father leaves town for a few days, and
despite one of his kids being roughly 20 and the others in double digits, he asks the children’s domineering, bitchy aunt to come look after them.
This should’ve allowed the older brother freedom while the dad’s away, and give him more opportunity to chip wood. When the aunt meets with
an unfortunate accident, the children scramble to try and figure out what to do next.
Following his gore laden, but pretty tedious, Cannibal Campout, Jon McBride set out to make a 70s style sitcom with a rather dire situation behind
it. While that is intriguing, the title is terribly misleading. I was expecting something as ridiculous as Nail Gun Massacre, and got a low budget
black comedy. Even Camp Motion Pictures releases the film as “unrated,” and makes the movie sound like a gore flick in the synopsis, so people
are still being mislead around what Woodchipper Massacre is about.
Predating both Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead and The Brady Bunch Movie, where a 70s style sitcom family also faces more current, adult
issues, Woodchipper Massacre had a really solid idea behind it. Unfortunately, those involved don’t always have the chops to pull it off. I
understand some of the over acting is intentional, but the movie is too yelly, and the child performers get more and more grating as the film
progresses. I remember thinking in an early scene that they weren’t too bad, especially considering the film’s budget, but their acting seems to
get worse throughout the movie. I can forgive cheap wigs, blurry video, and cheesy acting, but the padding (why do these low budget filmmakers
keep filming people driving around in cars?) really needed to go. The film remains surprisingly well made despite the budget constraints; it’s just
not always as funny as it could be.
Aside from McBride’s 80s hairdo, a fair bit of the comedy falters, mostly due to the kids performances. However, there is one absolutely brilliant
sequence that transcends even these flaws and justifies checking this movie out.
Jon McBride showed potential as an actor and director, but I recently saw him in the Polonia brother’s Dweller and think he’s actually moved down
the ranks…
Fans of Woodchipper Massacre should be well pleased, as this DVD has some nice extras. There’s a still gallery and the film’s trailer, plus the
trailer for Cannibal Campout, and those of a few other low budget horror flicks. Mike Polonia hosts a commentary with McBride, and despite
McBride literally phoning in his participation, this is quite a good track. There’s a lot that can be learned from someone that’s made a roughly $400
movie, except how to name your film, maybe, as Jon McBride reveals he’s always liked Woodchipper Massacre’s misleading title.
A short making of is actually quite entertaining, with a “where are they now?” feel. The most amazing thing is that young star Tom Casiello went
on to win an Emmy! Oddly, though, an interview is included with some horror fan who tells how he finally got to see Cannibal Campout.
Jon McBride is not present for that extra, but there is also an interview with him with a guy called Video Bob. One of my worst EBay experiences
was with someone I assume was the same Video Bob, but I didn’t hold that against McBride, and it was fun to see him years later, yet looking
exactly the same.
Woodchipper Massacre was shot on video, and the bottom of the screen has a constant electronic line. It is revealed in McBride’s interview that
the original elements were lost, so the DVD must’ve been sourced from a video cassette. Regardless, it’s nice to see another low budget film
salvaged from obscurity and debuting on the DVD format.
decided I needed to own it. He lent it to me first, and after watching it, I decided maybe I didn’t need it after all…
In Woodchipper Massacre a loving, happy family has rented a woodchipper for doing some yard work. The father leaves town for a few days, and
despite one of his kids being roughly 20 and the others in double digits, he asks the children’s domineering, bitchy aunt to come look after them.
This should’ve allowed the older brother freedom while the dad’s away, and give him more opportunity to chip wood. When the aunt meets with
an unfortunate accident, the children scramble to try and figure out what to do next.
Following his gore laden, but pretty tedious, Cannibal Campout, Jon McBride set out to make a 70s style sitcom with a rather dire situation behind
it. While that is intriguing, the title is terribly misleading. I was expecting something as ridiculous as Nail Gun Massacre, and got a low budget
black comedy. Even Camp Motion Pictures releases the film as “unrated,” and makes the movie sound like a gore flick in the synopsis, so people
are still being mislead around what Woodchipper Massacre is about.
Predating both Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead and The Brady Bunch Movie, where a 70s style sitcom family also faces more current, adult
issues, Woodchipper Massacre had a really solid idea behind it. Unfortunately, those involved don’t always have the chops to pull it off. I
understand some of the over acting is intentional, but the movie is too yelly, and the child performers get more and more grating as the film
progresses. I remember thinking in an early scene that they weren’t too bad, especially considering the film’s budget, but their acting seems to
get worse throughout the movie. I can forgive cheap wigs, blurry video, and cheesy acting, but the padding (why do these low budget filmmakers
keep filming people driving around in cars?) really needed to go. The film remains surprisingly well made despite the budget constraints; it’s just
not always as funny as it could be.
Aside from McBride’s 80s hairdo, a fair bit of the comedy falters, mostly due to the kids performances. However, there is one absolutely brilliant
sequence that transcends even these flaws and justifies checking this movie out.
Jon McBride showed potential as an actor and director, but I recently saw him in the Polonia brother’s Dweller and think he’s actually moved down
the ranks…
Fans of Woodchipper Massacre should be well pleased, as this DVD has some nice extras. There’s a still gallery and the film’s trailer, plus the
trailer for Cannibal Campout, and those of a few other low budget horror flicks. Mike Polonia hosts a commentary with McBride, and despite
McBride literally phoning in his participation, this is quite a good track. There’s a lot that can be learned from someone that’s made a roughly $400
movie, except how to name your film, maybe, as Jon McBride reveals he’s always liked Woodchipper Massacre’s misleading title.
A short making of is actually quite entertaining, with a “where are they now?” feel. The most amazing thing is that young star Tom Casiello went
on to win an Emmy! Oddly, though, an interview is included with some horror fan who tells how he finally got to see Cannibal Campout.
Jon McBride is not present for that extra, but there is also an interview with him with a guy called Video Bob. One of my worst EBay experiences
was with someone I assume was the same Video Bob, but I didn’t hold that against McBride, and it was fun to see him years later, yet looking
exactly the same.
Woodchipper Massacre was shot on video, and the bottom of the screen has a constant electronic line. It is revealed in McBride’s interview that
the original elements were lost, so the DVD must’ve been sourced from a video cassette. Regardless, it’s nice to see another low budget film
salvaged from obscurity and debuting on the DVD format.
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